Thank you so much for that kick-ass tent you bought us from Target. We never sent you a thank-you note, because we have no idea who you are.
I’m sure you think we are the most ungrateful couple ever, because you shelled out your hard-earned cash for a big ol’ green tent, and we didn’t say a thing about it. We feel really terrible about it. Every time I look at the tent in the study, I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. It was the only thing we never thanked anyone for. And it’s a BIG thing. We even pinned the shipping receipt (which says that it was sold to me, even though I most certainly did not buy it) to the back of the door, in hopes that it will somehow, a year and a half later, reveal some hidden clues about your identity.
We tried to find out who you are, but to no avail. We got our parents to subtly ask around. I even posted something on Facebook about it, but all I got were responses that said stuff like, “Ooh, a tent! How awesome!” I know. It is totally awesome. But it’s an awkward thing to ask people about. There were some people who didn’t get us anything, but you can’t go up to those people and say, “Did you get us that sweet tent?” Because then they’ll blush and say, “Erm, nope. Didn’t get you anything.” You know?
All this to say, thanks. A lot. We feel very humbled and happy to get the tent. We will think of your anonymous face with fondness when we go camping. I just wanted you to know that we’re thankful. Because we are.
A & G